créditos: Pixabay

The envy of real life

In this space I always try to get examples from real life. After all, we kind of enjoy knowing the truth and inspire ourselves with facts that actually happened. But I’m also aware that we are influenced by the media.

Do you believe that leading a simple, happy life, having a beautiful, dedicated wife, having healthy children and being able to pay all bills thanks to your job can cause any kind of envy? If you think only the most notable, powerful and influential people are enviable, I must tell you that you’re wrong.

I have a friend who’s gorgeous, inside and out. A great mother, an awesome friend, a real partner to all the other moms. She wakes up early every day, works hard and is always smiling. The funny thing is that some people who are close to her, instead of allying to this female profile, tend to cause intrigues and distill a poison which is obviously pure envy! We are used to seeing women creating chaos, jealous of their husbands and nuts about female issues.

But believe me, men also do that – also because they’re jealous and envy of their colleagues. They gossip to other husbands, causing discomfort among the group, and the reason for that is being envious of a nice couple, a well-raised child.

What does this have to do with that gorgeous friend of mine? Another friend’s husband has woven a web of intrigue and gossip to this friend’s husband. And I know that’s gossiping because I was the only person who was present to prove that everything the envious hubby told the other one was a lie.

The truth is that happiness, even simple happiness, may be a huge problem for people who cannot find their own way. It’s much easier wishing to have a glamorous, happy life, than actually doing something in order to reach that goal.

Since we’re kids we learn envy is both a sin and a taboo – and that, in many cases, make us keep quiet about our admiration towards some people. It’s as if we couldn’t or maybe shouldn’t be feeling happy for the others, because some people might mistake your true feelings for envy. They’ll accuse you, and you might have the chance to defend yourself or not. Or maybe you can admit that you feel envy towards someone or something, and that what you feel isn’t admiration at all.

C’mon, we’ve all been there. When you work too hard, you wish you had the life of that friend who can sleep until late every morning. And maybe that friend wishes quite the opposite, thinking how great it would be if he had a job such as yours, so he needn’t spend so much time in bed.

Being envious or jealous of someone or of a situation is normal. Just don’t make it a bad thing about it. Don’t use this feeling to create intrigue or quarrels, that’s pitiful, really.

Try not to become the bad apple, the person who is always complaining, gossiping and transforming feelings into something huge. Life is made of exchanges, wishes and conflicts, and dealing with the combination of these three items is the fuel we need in order to put our lives to work.

 


Mariana Goulart


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